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Courtly Love and Chivalry

This lecture/discussion was presented to the Joan of Arc Commandery on February 14, 2002.

You have already heard the term "Courtly Love" used in the context of the Medieval Romances, but the German author, Gaston Paris in 1883, actually introduced this term. According to The Middle Ages, a concise Enclycopaedia, "Courtly Love received its finest expression in the songs of the 12th century troubadours in Languedoc. The actual nature of this highly ritualized code of love remains debatable; several sources have been suggested – Ovid’s Ars Amatoria, Hispano-Arabic poetry and Platonic thought, among others – but the language and imagery of Courtly Love reflect the feudal, courtly environment in which the concept evolved."

Chivalry has been described as ‘the secular code of honor of a martially oriented aristocracy’. Again, from The Middle ages, "Chivalry developed its characteristic institutions, rules and conventions in the course of the 12th and 13th centuries at the hands of poets, as much as at the hands of legislators. The tournament became the characteristic institution of the chivalric world, though disapproved of by the church. For all of the dangers of tournaments – and casualties were often very heavy – the secular feudal world adopted them as profitable training grounds for your warriors and as great spectacles at which military valor could be colorfully displayed."

And, as women were present as spectators at these events, the ideals of service to Ladies and Courtly Love became intertwined with the concept of the ideal warrior. A 13th century poem lays four obligations on the Knight; 1) To eschew (or refrain from) false judgment and treason, 2) To honor women, 3) To attend mass every day and 4) To fast on Friday.

In the Arthurian or Grail Romances, these legendary adventures of Knights and their Ladies have enchanted generations, and imprinted these archetypal concepts into the Western Consciousness. Before these ‘Romances’ (which, BTW is derived form the French ‘roman" which applied to any long poem1) the essence of these ‘tales’ were the poem-songs of Troubadours in the courts of Southern France.

Specifically, in these stories, the lover submits to his lady as a Knight to his lord, swearing loyal and enduring service. This woman is almost always unattainable by virtue of her social status or physical distance, and by her fear of social censure; it was, paradoxically, her vary distance that lent value to the lover’s patient suffering. The lady’s worth could be increased by dispensing merce (some token of her affection) to a worthy and deserving suitor, yet the Lady who submitted too soon would be condemned.

The lover’s inner struggle between his desire for immediate fulfillment and his awareness of the virtue of striving for the unattainable; between the self-imposed state of submission and the overwhelming need to express pain and resentment: it is these antithesis that lend the poetry of courtly Love its dramatic tension and release. But was there more, perhaps to it than that? Some have suggested, and poets such as Dante seem to hint - that in the apparent "worship" of the unattainable woman is perhaps the worship of the Virgin or "Our Lady" Sophia. The devotion to a lady in some instances, takes on a certain religious fervor, which perhaps honors and values the ‘feminine’ aspect of deity, exalting her to a degree that the church had not previously recognized her.

In Courtly Love, the emphasis was on the difference between the cult of "True" Love (which was both earthly and heavenly), or Fin’amors, as contrasted with the Fals’amors of the majority (which was merely earthly); characterized by inconstancy, insincerity, and petty jealousy, and which excluded them from the loving elite. This Fin’amors was also to some a "distant love", which could only be attained by a renunciation of the deceitful love that characterized normal relations between men and women.

This was also sometimes referred to as ‘Chaste’ Love, and in some of the Grail Cycles, Gawain and/or Parsifal is described as ‘Chaste’. As some of you may know from experience or visiting our website, a Knight or Dame of the Grail is required to take the 3 customary Chivalric oaths of; 1) Obedience 2) Poverty and 3) Chastity. These of course, are not to be taken literally, but are explained to the initiate as to their esoteric interpretation. Chastity to the OTG Knight or Dame does no imply celibacy, but rather a certain refinement of the vehicles and re-direction of the vital force for the purpose of regeneration.

I cannot say too much more on this subject, without revealing the contents of an initiation, but suffice it to say, that it is this very ‘cult of love’ that purifies and refines the rugged warrior-knight, into the poetic gentleman. I read a discussion recently on a certain e-list (that will remain unnamed) equating this self-imposed state of submission of the Knight to S&M "sex play". That would be a very crude interpretation of it to say the least, and to me this demonstrates a lack of understanding of the subject matter, and a very superficial and mundane interpretation of the concept.

The first and most obvious difference between S & M and Chivalric devotion is this; if the Knight could draw the lady’s attention, and convince her of his pretz (worth) and valor (courage) that was further increased by his pure and noble Love – he would request merce (pity) and some reward. The Lady was bound by convention to comply with the Knight’s reasonable demands, much as a Lord would be bound to reward his faithful retainers; and if she failed to offer some favor or hope, she was branded cruel and heartless. So obviously, the Knight is not ‘enjoying punishment’ by some cruel and domineering master.

Before we begin our discussion, let us meditate for a moment on ‘the cult of love’ as a vehicle for self-transformation, and how though earthly and physical pleasures might be obtainable for us, the eternal abiding grace and beauty of Love often eludes us, much the same as Sophia, or wisdom. Though we may pursue her, and even possess her bodily, we cannot force her grace or her gifts, which she must willingly bestow upon us if as worthily suitors we have won her favor.

If in our Quest for the Grail, we find renewal and transformation and are able to as our Collect says, to "keep our love in flower, knowing that thy inmost shrine has its seat in our hearts", we might then someday remember this secular holiday of romance fondly, for opening our minds and hearts to the eternal. In this fine season of spring and renewal, may you find "our Lady" wisdom and enjoy the delights of her love in your life.

 
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